In Pursuit of my Personal Legend

Thursday, July 14, 2011


"Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen. Through faith we understand that the worlds were framed by the word of God, so that things which are seen were not made of things which do appear." Hebrews Chapter 11 is the best chapter that defines faith. Right now more than ever I am limping by through the virtues of faith and hope.

One of my younger sisters is in so much trouble. She has gotten herself in a relationship that has changed her into something that she is not meant to be. I know Lord that You want better for her. So my heart just aches and aches, for blood ties etch deeper than we could ever imagine.

And my Mother she has gone through so much. Although our relationship is still in shaky ground, it is better than before. Then in faith I ask Jesus to soften my heart and let go of unforgiveness. Mami works so hard and in this strange country that she has come to, to find freedom, her heart is still broken. She pines and cares deeply for her children as only a mother could.

Then there is the family back in Uganda. They have prayed so hard to come to Canada. To find better health a safer place . . .So I pray along with them the same prayers a 5 year old me prayed about 14years ago. Praying that faith will bring them closer to us. . .

There is the question of faith I encounter in the everyday with friends and coworkers. Searching looking for something. All I can do is hold my breath knowing that faith is right in front of them. I ask Jesus to fight for them like He has fought for me so many times.

Again, I am stuck in crossroads. Decisions, decisions. Do I go down this path? If I do am I going to regret it? Through faith though these crossroads have become little paths in the forest, leading me to green pastures and on occasion lead me to refreshing rivers from gushing waterfalls, full of grace. In these woods I learn about perseverance, hard but rewarding love. Yes life hurts but the sun will always shine and rain causes the shrubs to blossom and some to grow into trees.


Wednesday, July 6, 2011

Our Space Together

(I am part of a faith jamming group of bloggers with the Faith Barista. Every Thursday she challenges countless bloggers to jam about their journey of faith. Her link is on the bottom of the page)

When I think of what you, Bonnie, call "whitespace" I think of stolen moments throughout my day with God. I think of times during the day when His name is desperate on my lips because I am so close to getting in trouble or I am in a sticky situation. I also think of times when His name is on my heart on inspiring summer days when I can feel Him in each blade of grass, each caress of the wind and His reflection on the sparkling river I pass each day I go to work.
During these times whether our conversation is brief or not- the feeling of being overwhelmed fills me. There seems to be so much to do and yet so little time. For me, though I don't have the responsibility of a family, my long commute to and from work overwhelms me when I get home. Everything in the house is scattered : clothes, dishes, and always tons and tons of paperwork. I am brought to Him in our space together asking "when do I have time for this . . ."

As I enter into His grace and I let Him coax me in, just simply breathing - everything seems to look a little more doable. He tells me in our space together that He is in control. I need to take each task one at a time. I need to prioritize and accept at the same time that there will be some hectic days when I come home burnt out, collapsing in bed and not getting anything on the list done  - AND IT'S OK. Then days of accomplishing a lot before bedtime will come too BUT I need to learn to balance the two different days and let His life flow through me in everyday.